• ygwrites

Is it too late after thirty? How to master reinventing yourself after 30

Queue Robot Voice: Alert! Alert! Alert! Are You Over 30?!

You thought that after 30 everything that was in disarray in your life would magically fall into place. You would know exactly what you wanted to do and how you wanted to do it, and BAM – everything just clicks. Except, typically for most of us, it doesn’t. From what I’ve noticed at my ripe age of 34 is that most of the anxiety about turning 30 comes from a eternal alarm going off, telling you that you were supposed to do or be something by now. Either a mom, or a financial success, or in a great fulfilling relationship, or all of the latter and more.

The reality is that most of us have not figured out what or who we really are by the time we reach 30. We often obsess about not being where we want to be to the point where it paralyzes us into stagnancy. If you are serious about reinventing yourself after 30, use these strategies.  

Stop Beating Yourself Up

In the words of the controversial Abby Lee Miller, “save your tears for the pillow.” The only way to get where you want to go is through action. The fact that you’re reading this lets me know that you are aware and awareness is the key to growth. I threw the world’s longest pity party for myself after turning 30 and guess what? All that did was waste time. It took me entirely too long to regroup and actively begin to reinvent myself. Don’t fall into the same depressive trap.

Get Real About Where You Are And Where You’re Going

Take some time to really reflect on what makes you happy. The goals and ambitions you had at 25 may not be applicable anymore. Take the pen to the pad, or your fingers to the keyboard, and ask yourself these questions:

What are my values?

What makes me happy?

What is my end goal?

What steps can I take to do the things that make me happy that reside in the realm of my values and morals?

Incremental Or Radical Change?

Some of us are able to radically make changes without falling on our faces and some people like me have to go the slow and steady route. I speak a lot about how incremental change transformed my life. You can read more about incremental change here.

Radical change may be abruptly switching to a vegan diet or selling all your things and moving abroad. There is nothing wrong with radical change and I believe that it ultimately gives us more bang for our buck so to speak. Sometimes making radical changes in your environment can promote mental changes and stimulation (or less stimulation) that will catapult you into the life you want. The only pitfall with radical change (assuming everything is thoughtfully planned out) is the burn out.

For example, I gave myself a crazy schedule that I ultimately could never keep up with, causing me to cease all my self work completely. I burnt myself out. If you know that you’re a traditionally inconsistent person or prone to burn out, incremental changes are probably best for you.

Create A Map

Create a map and plan out your future with precision. To create your map, ask yourself these questions?

What am I trying to accomplish overall?

How long will it take me to accomplish?

What steps should I take to accomplish my overall goal?

Note: If you are implementing incremental changes, how can you break down these steps into smaller pieces so that you’re not overwhelmed?

***This step is vital because it can make or break your success. When mapping out your plans, be sure to consider the order of execution, timelines, and resources needed to reach your goals. Also, have fun with this step. If you’re a visual person, create a real map or vision board!

You Can Teach An Old Dog New Tricks

We know that our brains continue to develop until about the age of 25 years old. However, this doesn’t mean that the brain is locked in place for all time after we turn 25. In the book, “The Brain The Story of You,” author, David Eagleman mentions a study about cab drivers in London and having to learn over 320 different routes and a ton of possible destinations to take their passengers. During the study of these cab drivers’ brains, they found that they developed a lobe or growth on the hippocampus region of their brain for spatial memory. This study lets us know that our brains can still be develop at later stages of our lives. 

Execute. Don’t Get Caught In The Planning Loop

I LOVE planning. I HATE the execution of those plans. It took me a while to realize how much I love to plan and dream. However, plans and dreams take us nowhere. It’s the execution of our plans that help us reach our goals. Don’t get stuck in the loop of the planning phase. If you are like me, make rules and stick to them.

Create your map or list of steps you need to take. Go deep and in depth and then execute. Inevitably, you’ll have to go back to the drawing board and re-calibrate, but only do this if something drastic occurs to change your plans. If nothing happens to take you off your course, commit to only review/alter your plans periodically. I’ve opted for once a month at the end of every month. However the frequency and time is up to you. Just be certain to not fall into the loop.

Join a Community

Remember that there are lots of tools and resources like this website online. Joining a community of people who are focused on self-growth and development will help facilitate and reinforce your goals and aspirations. Don’t be discouraged, we’re all in this together!

How will you reinvent yourself after 30? Lets discuss below!

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